Personal Privacy: Importance

Privacy is very important to me. In fact, it is so important that I do not feel comfortable posting this blog lest I expose you to the workings of my inner sanctum of seanliness. Just kidding. I have no problems exposing you to my secret machinations. I'll just have to kill you afterwards.


On a related note, I have an actual example to support my hypothesis on the importance of privacy (that it is, in fact, important) You see, I was going over my previous blog entries a little while ago, and I found out that I am, in fact, deceased (read my previous blog entries and you will find the episode in which I died). This happened due to a lack of privacy in my attempts to not so secretly undermine our glorious raptor lords. Yes, I was eaten by a velociraptor. So remember kids, privacy can save your life. And no, I will not describe in detail what it is like being dead. I value my privacy too much.

Of course, being not alive makes getting that crucial privacy so much easier. My body is just a rotting scrap of its former self buried deep beneath the ground, and people can't actually see my radiant new form as the tangible display of raw ethereal might it truly is. That is to say, for all intents and purposes, I am invisible. a fact that is no doubt distressing to the young man whose computer I am using to type this blog. Don't worry Douglass, I won't be here long.

Well, back when I was alive, my strategies for hoarding my privacy were the same as those I used for avoiding conflicts (detailed in the same blog entry in which I was eaten). I was rather reclusive and meek. At home anyway. I didn't call attention to myself, and as a result, my life was so surprisingly private and well guarded that the Raptor overlords let me entertain the notion that I could bring about some form of successful rebellion against them by toiling in secrecy. Of course, I was a fool for thinking so, for the Raptors see all.

So at the last, I must illustrate to you all the folly of expecting privacy. In the end the only way to be shielded from the omniscient eyes of our Raptor overlords is to be semi-existent, like myself. And even now I am not so sure that they aren't monitoring my every action.

Praise the Raptor overlords, and Praise to Vog.